no. (roses_rejoice) wrote,

  • Mood:

My Lord and Lady and all that jazz.

As previously threatened, this e'en we went to Medieval Times for the Lipizzaner/falconry/jousting dinner theater. We had a blast and a half, helped along by about 60 oz. of beer apiece, although our knight didn't win :( They assign you to root for a specific knight out of the cast of characters pictured below

and structure the story so the only one left surviving at the end of the evening is the one who the Princess is in love with. All the people involved are killer horse riders and stage combateers, so between that and the fact that they are doing all this in a reasonably small indoor arena while 700 people are eating dinner it's pretty damn impressive. For an extra fee, there was also a dungeon exhibit that was definitely not for kiddies (more certain to please the BDSM set), plus the aforementioned bar and medieval souvenir stands worthy of Disneyland. In addition to the usual t-shirts and teddy bears, there are even swords and suits of armor you can buy if you have, oh, say an extra nine grand laying around the house. Ted got a kick out of the signs announcing "Fathers Day Special - All Weapons 20% Off!"

You can also pay extra for a Knighthood Ceremony with pictures. I decided not to make whatsisname endure that at this time. Since they will also knight women, I'll save that to inflict on my mom the next time she visits. I will spare you the dorky souvenir photo of us wearing paper crowns and posing with the Princess Esperanza, as it is the kind of photo that really should be seen only by our moms and I insisted on buying it after Ted accused me of being too loaded to utilize proper judgment in my purchases. We did get to see a really cute photo taken of the princess with four little girls about 9 years old who were clearly there celebrating one of their birthdays and had all dressed up in very well-executed princess costumes for the occasion. They were so well costumed, I thought they were part of the show at first. For additional surrealism, the entire place is entered via a mall where about 2/3 of the mall clientele are straight out of a Snoop Dogg video shoot and you can see a fast food joint directly outside the "castle" door.

Anyway, if you are located anywhere near one of those places and are by any means Into that stuff, I heartily recommend going. I'm not at all Into that stuff and I still had so much fun!
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