no. (roses_rejoice) wrote,

  • Mood:

In which I seriously wonder

Earlier, the lovely and talented minniethemoocha wrote, "Most humans are afraid of loss or change in relationships."

I seriously wonder if that statement applies to me anymore. Not that I haven't been afraid in the past, no no no of course I have. It's just that I've now lost everything several times over. In several different ways: death, substance-induced persona change, getting ditched, or just realizing that "there's no THERE there." To the point where I have scar tissue and big orange barrels.

I'm not depwessed, having just given and received good chat with derekfz and having consumed a ton of food (I'm hungry these last two days for some hormonal or body-related reason, and have eaten twice as much as usual), and now relaxing with the last of the el crappo bottle of white wine followed by Dunkin' Donuts coffee lite. Rather, I am just merely considering whether I could be hurt any more? I doubt that I will let any new ppl get that close to me, and the ones who already are, well, I'm used to whatever they could possibly pull. I *think*. I don't want to get overconfident but...I really think the Days of Whine O'er Bozos are over. Fin. Knock on a woody.
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