no. (roses_rejoice) wrote,

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Stupid Advertising Tricks, Episode 213

OK OK OK I'll answer everyone's extremely lovely comments tomorrow. Right now, this is rant-o-rama! As someone apparently in a Target Age Group who has Disposable Income, I would just like to make the following points (listen up ad guys, this is saving you precious consumer research dollars!!):

1) People who listen to "The Beatles at Bedtime" on the oldies station, like me (who flips it on in the car because I am usually pulling out of the parking garage about that time to finally go home), are listening to the happy, hoppy, hippy Be-ea-zeatles because they too want to Get Happy! before bed. I am sure I am not alone when I explain to you that I do not Get Happy! when "Blackbird Singing in the Dead of Night" is followed by an advert for the most comfortable MRI procedures in the urban area, which is then followed by a commercial for a funeral parlor. "That morning I was with Dad at the hospital, and by that afternoon we were at JoeBlow's funeral home with so much to do," or something like that. What's more, when these same two ads pop up for an extended period of time in the middle of "Beatles at Bedtime," following such timeless gems as "You're Gonna Lose That Girl" and "Back in the USSR", I can only assume a plot on the part of antidepressant and antianxiety manufacturers. In short, I DO NOT WANT TO HEAR THAT CRAP BEFORE BED AND ESPECIALLY NOT IN THE MIDDLE OF PAUL MCCARTNEY DAMMIT!

2) Whoever is selling that repackaged James Taylor compilation that is being advertised on CNN needs to know that it is Extremely Disconcerting to see a shot of James Taylor at 20 with all his moody long hair out in the country, juxtaposed with a shot of James Taylor now at 50 or 55 or whatever age the man is, bald and looking like someone's old Uncle Charlie, singing the same songs in the same voice. It was like a Seinfeld parody of the Johnny Cash video for "Hurt", the more so because the top of JT's head had been carefully cropped off the compilation CD cover so as not to show potential customers his shiny pate. I haven't had such a turn of contrasts since I watched "Casablanca" on TV with a bunch of my friends at age 18 and the station put on an ad for "A Woman Called Golda", starring aged Ingrid Bergman in the title role, right smack in the middle.

But wtf do I know? I have been listening to Harry Chapin since I was 10 and only just last week figured out that "W-O-L-D" was supposed to spell something. I am not kidding.
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