Of all the (living) people I ever knew in a close way (I hate that I'm going to have to put that "living" modifier on forever now, but I guess it gets us all eventually and some when much younger than me), there's exactly one that I wish would come back and be friends, and I expect that wish will pass with time like a kidney stone.
(Side note: I'm also so flippin' tired of having pictures of a certain party shoved at me (note, said party is Not repeat Not on livejournal) that I'd like to break said party's nose. I don't want to look at you anymore. 'Nuff said.)
I can't imagine going through this without the people close to me now. What if it had happened five years ago when I had chosen to have no one around but whatsisname and my mom? What if it had happened and I didn't even know about it and found out about it later? What if it happened when I had no one to talk to about it? *shudder* At least I had trustworthy people to call, to talk to. I am blessed in that regard At least.
I feel myself once again losing interest in going to any shows other than big d's. it always makes me happy to hear him play. there are very few musicians whose shows make me consistently happy. mascis maybe. i dunno. I'll probably feel better about music again but right now is not an up time. anyway people who run around yammering about how much they love music make me laugh, most of 'em just want to be a part of something so bad. I can relate some, but if you are over the age of 14 and not a professional musician and you're all like OOOOOO i LOOOOOOOOVE MUSIC I'm still gonna laff at you. I'd name a name or two but because I respect the friends list of my good friends and like to keep the drama level low, I'll skip it and just laugh quietly to myself like I usually do.