October 24th, 2004

john + yoko

layout

Well well well, it's always cool to come home and see LJ has effed with their code and affected my layout. My HTML is about on the same level as a backyard mechanic changing his oil, but I'll fake it till I make it. till then just read the dang thang off yer f(r)iends page, it should look a'ight there unless you're having a problem. with HTML I mean...i know everybody on here is Having Some Kind of Problem...
pumpkinhead

Pumpkin Post

Carving a pumpkin is one of those joys of life that people like me often ignore or stick on the back burner, until a kid or a parent (same thing kinda) gets all excited about having us carve one. Or two, if "they were two for only $5 at Marc's!"

Oh how I used to labor as a kid to make the basic jack o'lantern face with triangular eyes and nose and a big smiley mouth with teeth. I'd draw it on first with a Magic Marker and cut really carefully on the lines. Since then I have read a lot of veggie art books and I was on a tight time sked so I just stabbed the dern things freehand. I did pretty good considering that all I had to work with was a 2-foot-long roast carving knife, a blunt steak knife dating back to about 1972, and an apple corer, plus I haven't carved a punkin since 1996. I know it was '96 because that was the year Ted and I visited a pumpkin patch, which I found to be one of the most glorious sights ever due to the contrast between the orange punks and the green greenery, and which I didn't even mind about its being probably half fake with some farmer importing the punkins from some faroff redneck county and scattering them artfully about his convenient yuppieside tourist farme so as to look like they all actually grew there, and wherein Ted took two dozen pictures of me in my dorky green jumper and hair bow happily hugging big fat pumpkins, and then we came home to find the historic movie theater ("historic" = synonym for "sound system quality similar to Al Jolson's early works") two blocks from our house being engulfed in a 4-alarm fire that led all the local news.

That was a big day, all right. Anyway they built a new and improved theater and I never again had time to mess with pumpkins until today. I have washed my hands three times and there's still orange residue on the right one. Those little bastids can bite.