no. (roses_rejoice) wrote,

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Subjects I Wonder About For Wednesday.

1) A few times now I've seen couples who have been together more than a few months bust up because they've decided they're "just good friends" or even "just Best friends" and not "romantic partners." Exactly what is the difference, pleeze? I always think it's code for "You're a cool person in my life but I really want to schtupp other ppl or maybe someone else in particular so I have to find some other box to stick you in." Being poly at heart, I've never seen the two thangs as mutually (s)exclusive, and I HATE boxes. I don't throw around the term "best friend" much because it sorta bugs me except as applied to mileshedgehog bcuz, well, bcuz. But if I had to swear on a stack of bibles who my Very Very Bestest Friend Evar Bob Evar wuz, it would be (surprise?!) Ted, who I happen to have married. Because if someone's not a "best friend" to me, with all the trust and responsibility and crap that implies, then how the hell could I possibly be legally attached to them 24/7? Legal shite is scary! I should know!

And there's been enuf of my "good friends" that I "did things" with or came really close, not in a "friends with benefits" sort of way - I don't need and never have needed sex that bad to make it a "benefit" - but because we loved each other and the time was right. Please note I am NOT saying I boffed or thought about boffing every one of my "good friends" although there's probably some idiot out there who wants to take it that way (see also previous comment re I Don't Need/ Want Sex That Bad, thanks). But just that I have never seen much of a difference between Friendship and Love. Maybe it's because I'm Libran and they supposedly see everything as love or romance just like Aquarius sees it all as friendship. Maybe it's because the idea of there being a Special One out there for each person died for me at a young age when it became apparent that the person I thought surely was my Special One didn't work out for practical reasons having zilch to do with their Specialness to me emotionally. Maybe it's because my buddy who was always looking for "that spark" just ended up staying single an extra ten years and then marrying the supposedly non-sparky person who'd been patiently waiting all that time, they could've got married ten years prior for all the difference it ended up making. I don't think I'm ever gonna get the difference between Couples and Friends. So sue me or shoot me or write bullshit stuff on the walls abt how I think/behave. I'm cool wit' my life, good luck finding the right boxes to draw around yer own shite.

2) Is there some way to write about exercise/weight without being totally Ob Noxious abt it? My book on changing habits says that "going public" is helpful in maintaining commitment. I can see the logic in this. However, I'm not interested in posting before and after pictures of my butt, tracking pounds lost (living by the number on the scale blows - I used to do it and not going back there), or writing long diatribes about how many pounds I lifted, how far I walked or how many hours I spent in the gym. I applaud people who work out but I think reading about it is the most boring evar and unless you're running competitive marathons I don't like all the back-patting people engage in when they reach some training milestone. Yes I know, I'm a curmudgeonly old bitch, so either give me a constructive suggestion or fuck off somewhere else. I like Amber's sticks-of-butter blog because it made me laugh, and weight/exercise is an area where I need all the laughs I can get so it doesn't get all (excuse the expression) "heavy", but I don't have the time nor patience to photograph butter every day.
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