no. (roses_rejoice) wrote,

  • Mood:

Or Maybe I Just Had Too Much Coffee.

I just listened to Unkle Bawb's new rekkid. The lyrics kinda lost me in spots cuz they seem to be abt getting/being Old an' stuff. Oddly, I can't relate. I feel like life is Bursting With Flava! and Possibilities! this morning. It's highly likely that I'm just having a caffeine and sugar rush as I just tore thru a 3-pack of Ho Hos for the second day in a row. Argh must stop, or else I'll be eating Ho Hos and ice cream for breakfast, lunch and dinner for a week, or just go whole hog and down an entire Baskin-Robbins ice cream cake...Hm doesn't sound so bad at that...*slaps hand* NO bad bad sugardrug addict, you!

Maybe Bobby needs to lay off the beer and hit the 31 flavas.

Uh, where was I...I'm constantly amused lately that, while the last 10 years have had their Upsanddowns, the decade of my greatest Angst (measured, of course, in Angstroms) was about age 24-34. The only really happy times I remember from in there are when I traveled to the Southwest and Australia. I'm leaving out the Florida assignment because, while I saw a lot of neat stuff (armadillos, Disney World, the Space Shuttle blasting off, etc.), I also remember being miserable for at least five minutes out of every day that "House of Pain" came on the radio. Probably more. And my job was sheer shittiness at that time.

Oh, I got married in there too. No that does not make the "Happiest Times List" either except maybe in the sense that a drowning man marooned in the middle of the lake is happy to find a drifting life preserver so he can at least float some and not die right away. Every day I see people all over the Internet being really happy abt getting married. I don't envy them because I know I would not be capable of feeling, under any circumstances, the way they apparently do.

Eh well those times are over! And I'm glad I got them out of the way. Gone is the worry abt edjumacation, abt fame, abt whether some jerk of a guy likes me (I relapsed a bit with that one in the early 00's but mama weer all ovuh that naow and thanks be!), abt my looks for the most part, abt my ability to survive if I lost a job, abt my ability to survive if some asswipe left me, abt my ability to leave home or stay home, abt whut ppl think if they aren't signing a paycheck. It's liberating like burning an uncomfortable underwire bra, I tells ya. It was worth not killing myself as a youngun just to reach this point. You can check back with me when the Ho Hos wear off and see if I still feel the same, but it's a good feeling even if it takes a cream filling trip to reach. Hell I dunt even mynd that it's sunny out right now!!!
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